It is the time of year when the smell of bonfire smoke lingers in the air and darkness falls much earlier. Bonfire Night is the night when everything goes with a bang. However things may be a little quieter this year!
You may not see quite so many brightly coloured, noisy fireworks that light up the sky this year but do not let that stop you from creating your own sexual firework display at home and add extra spice to your sex life. From the slow burn of the catherine wheel to the squealing wail of the rocket and the erratic pop of bangers, discover what fireworks work for you in the bedroom or outside!
Fireworks are fun
Sex is meant to be enjoyed, just like fireworks. Avoiding or neglecting sex is like keeping the curtains closed when there is an amazing fireworks display going off right outside your window – you don’t know what you are missing. Why not try having sex with the curtains open? You never know who might be watching!
Fireworks are loud
Create your own bangers!
By vocalising how you feel you can show your partner you love what they are doing to you. If something feels really good, tell them and vice versa. The more encouragement you give, the more they will do it and the better sex will be.
Enjoy daytime fireworks too
Often sex is the last thing on the minds of many couples after a long day and all they want to do is sink into bed and fall asleep. If this is you, why not try having sex at alternative times of the day. Early morning sex is a great way to start your day, so set the alarm a little earlier and enjoy each other before breakfast. Most children are in the deepest part of their sleep pattern during this time, so you are less likely to be disturbed. If they do wake up, encourage them to go downstairs and watch TV – even 10 minutes can be long enough.
Arranging a secret rendezvous in the middle of the day when your children are at school can feel naughty, but will enhance your sexual pleasure. Why not try quickie sex, especially if you are on a time limit: the more frantic, the better and you can spend the rest of the day with a huge smile on your face or just indulge in some foreplay to keep you going until bedtime! Be creative and choose a time when you both have more energy.
With many of us working from home, rather than a coffee break, enjoy some quickie sex or self pleasure, perhaps at your desk! According to research by sex toy manufacturer Hot Octopuss 40% of us are getting ourselves off in the workplace and often when people masturbated at work, they came back reinvigorated, and filled with creative ideas! Also great stress relief too.
As someone who has a desk covered with sex toys, I have no excuse!
Did you know that not only does enjoying a good sex life boost your overall health, it can positively impact upon your job satisfaction and productivity too.
Fireworks can happen indoors and outside
Think outside your bedroom and even outside your home to spice up your sex life. Sex becomes boring when couples get stuck in a rut but you can mix up your sexual routine by trying something different. Have sex in the kitchen, incorporating food play or get in a lather in the shower or bath to add some excitement to your sex life. Explore a sex dungeon!
Many couples enjoy the exhilaration of outdoor sex, the thrill that you may be caught or the wildness of the weather across your body increasing sexual pleasure and arousal.
Sex becomes more thrilling and exhilarating when you venture to step outside your comfort zone so try new things such as different sexual positions, kink, role play or introduce a sex toy into your sexual relationship.
When pushed beyond your normal sexual routine you both may be pleasantly surprised at how you feel. You may find your inner sex kitten or dominatrix just itching to get out so don’t be afraid to tell your partner what you love them doing to you and what you’d love to do to them. You never know until you try it, you may love being the spanker or spankee.
How about waxplay or temperature? You can create your own firework patterns in the brightly coloured skin safe wax or light your own flames with fireplay ! What about Youou sex toys if fire is just too hot for you?
Add some sexploration into your relationship or go alone. Try something new, like an intimate massage party or female only bisexual party
If you have children, privacy can be an issue and having sex all over the house might not be possible. Make sure you have a lock on the door and use it. Ask relatives or friends to look after your children and see how sexually inventive you can be both indoors and outside.
Not all fireworks are the same
We all have our favourite fireworks we like to watch and sex can be the same.
I love rabbit vibrator and the slow spinning of sparks building up to a spectacular fireball of colour, whereas my partner loves really loud bangers and their erratic nature. This can relate to sex: the slow burning Catherine Wheel representing prolonged foreplay accumulating in a spectacular orgasm, and the noisy bangers being fast, intense sex. Try Miss Bi, my favourite Rabbit, she may look small, but her diminutive size is very deceptive!
All firework displays are a combination of different fireworks and so can your sex life. By adding variety to your sex life, you can spice it up and get your sexual emotions exploding.
Try adding sex toys into your sex play, such as a clitoral vibrator to massage over your clitoris during sex or a couples toy. Why not treat your partner to his own male sex toy, designed to make him explode with pleasure.
Sex toys come in different shapes and sizes and are made from an array of materials so consider an icicle made for beautifully crafted glass, or a metal toy ideal for heating up in warm water or cooling down in the fridge for a chilling sexual sensation.
Fireworks go off all year round
Have sex all the time, not just on special occasions. Having sex once a week on the same day is just boring. Sex does not have to last for hours. When you increase the amount of sex you have, you’ll want more. When couples ask if it is better to have sex in the morning or at night, why choose? Kick start your sex life with a bang and let your passion explode into a magnificent display of your own sexual fireworks!
COVID-19 and Sex
Whilst many of these recommendations are fun, some may have to be put on hold this year but are great ideas to store away when COVID 19 is under control.
This is new advice released by Terrance Higgins Trust ( August 2020) about sex whilst managing COVID-19 risk and social distancing. The full statement can be found on their website.
“While stating that you or someone in your household is the best choice of consensual sexual partner, the new guidance includes practical advice like sticking with one partner or as few partners as possible. It’s also clear that if either person is feeling unwell, then they shouldn’t have sex.
Other tips include avoiding kissing, wearing a face mask and favouring positions where you’re not face-to-face, as well as using condoms or dams for oral sex and rimming.
There’s also information about the importance of thinking about sexual health before starting to have sex again. That includes the strong recommendation of getting tested for sexually transmitted infections before starting to have sex again”.